


An Ache Keenly Felt

by aislingdoheanta



Series: Intimate Conversations [13]
Category: Spartacus Series (TV), Spartacus: War of the Damned
Genre: Canon Era Fic, Episode: The Dead and the Dying, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Missing Scene, episode 3.09
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-19
Updated: 2013-04-19
Packaged: 2017-12-08 21:51:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,809
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/766425
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aislingdoheanta/pseuds/aislingdoheanta
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>“I have missed you,” Nasir whispered into his hair. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>Agron could not speak. Partly because he could not think of words that would be truthful in telling Nasir how great the ache of parting was for him. How he wished every day to catch a glimpse of Nasir's smile. How, even when he was hanging from the cross, he wished for Nasir's arms to find their way around him, to offer comfort and protection. </i>
</p>
<p>Agron's thoughts as Nasir tends his wounds after being reunited. If Agron had been less weak and tired, perhaps he would have said more.</p>
            </blockquote>





	An Ache Keenly Felt

**Author's Note:**

> Missing Scene fic.

“Allow me to help,” Nasir had whispered to him as they carefully walked along. Agron had nodded and placed more weight upon the Syrian in order to move quicker and easier away from the crowd.

Agron had wanted to fall into Nasir's arms and weep when he had seen him. He hadn't noticed him until the Syrian placed a hand carefully against Agron's cheek. Then he heard the voice he had missed and words that soothed the heart and gave hope. 

It was too much yet not enough. Agron just wanted to be away from everyone, alone with Nasir, so he could once again find his place in this world. Discover if he still had a place with Nasir.

They arrived back at their— _Nasir's_ tent and Agron was grateful the man hadn't taken him to the medicus. He knew that he needed proper tending to, tending that he had assumed both Spartacus and Nasir would have forced him to see to, but he did not wish to go yet. He did not wish to hear what he knew. 

That he would no longer be useful in battle. After all, what good is a soldier that could no longer hold sword or shield. 

Nasir helped him sit on the cot before pressing himself against Agron. He gently gripped Agron's head and pressed his own against Agron's hair. Agron tried to wrap his arms around Nasir, but had only the strength to rest them at his hips. 

“I have missed you,” Nasir whispered into his hair. 

Agron could not speak. Partly because he could not think of words that would be truthful in telling Nasir how great the ache of parting was for him. How he wished every day to catch a glimpse of Nasir's smile. How, even when he was hanging from the cross, he wished for Nasir's arms to find their way around him, to offer comfort and protection. 

Yet, if he admitted all of that, he would also have to admit the fear that captured his throat when he thought of what awaited him if he arrived back at the rebel camp. Rather, what he assumed would not be waiting for him. Nasir should not be so kind and gentle for Agron was a fool to leave his side. No, he was worse than a fool and no longer deserved Nasir's love. Though, he never truly had deserved it to begin with. 

Nasir pulled away and kissed both of his cheeks and carefully wiped under Agron's eyes. He must have shed tears, though he had not known. 

“Let us get you cleaned up,” Nasir said quietly as he began unwrapping the cloths that were wrapped around Agron's shoulder, chest, and stomach. He inhaled sharply at the sight of Agron's wounds, but his hands remained gentle, even as they shook. 

He walked to retrieve some of the water he had kept in his room. Agron could only watch as he carried it to Agron's side before kneeling before him. 

Nasir dipped a clean cloth into the water before bringing it to his face, wiping away the sweat, blood, and tears of the past days. Agron closed his eyes at Nasir's touch for it was _too_ gentle and completely undeserved.

Yet if the past days taught Agron anything it was that he was weak and he could not, _would_ not voice his fears and the truth because he did not wish to see Nasir from his side again. 

A woman walked in carrying another jug of water and more clean cloths. “The medicus would require your presence in the tent,” she said to Agron. 

He wanted to tell her to fuck off because this might be his only chance with Nasir, but did not have time before Nasir answered her. 

“Then he shall have to wait,” Nasir said. He did not move his eyes from his cleansing of Agron's face. 

“He demands to treat the wounded,” she tried again. 

Nasir finally looked at her and something in his gaze must have frightened her because she took a step back. “His demands fall on one who is not moved.” He set the dirtied cloth aside. “His presence shall be called upon when it is needed. Now go.” 

She bowed her head and hastily made her escape. 

Agron attempted a smile, but he knew it came across as a grimace of pain. “Gratitude,” he whispered. 

Nasir paused in cleaning the wound on his shoulder, looking him in the eyes. “You do not need to be moved at present.” He moved the cloth to the wound and clenched his jaw at Agron's hiss of pain. “Nor would you prefer to be in others' company.” 

Agron hissed again as Nasir scrubbed at the wounded area. “Yours is the only one I desire,” he said softly, gritting his teeth against the pain. 

Nasir smiled at him and continued cleaning his entire shoulder. He leaned forward and pressed a kiss to the wound he had just cleaned before pressing his forehead against Agron's chest for a moment. 

Agron used all his strength to place a hand upon Nasir's head, hoping it would give him some comfort, as he had not the words to speak. 

“Your thoughts echo through the tent,” Nasir said suddenly as he pulled away. He grabbed a new cloth to begin cleaning Agron's neck, chest, and other shoulder. 

“There is much on mind,” Agron admitted as he looked down at Nasir. 

“You should speak then, so I may help carrying the burden,” Nasir said quietly. 

Agron smiled at him and sighed. “If they were formed.” 

Nasir nodded. “Know that I am here, if you choose to share.” He quickly finished Agron's chest and stood, crossing the tent. He filled a cup of water and brought it back to Agron.

“You should drink to regain a little strength,” he said quietly as he placed a hand on the back of Agron's head. He brought the cup to Agron's lips and smiled when Agron allowed Nasir to help him drink. 

Agron did not wish to be thought of as weak, but he had no energy to fight. He would gladly accept any comfort, any touch, any help that Nasir would willingly offer. 

“Gratitude,” Agron said softly when he finished. 

Nasir kept his hand upon his hand and pressed his lips to Agron's forehead. “It is of small matter.” 

Nasir sat down next to Agron upon the cot and pulled his arm into his lap. He began washing his arm using gentle hands and touches, treating Agron as though he was breakable. 

It reminded Agron of how careful he had been with Nasir when they were first learning of each other. He hadn't wanted to hurt or startle him. Or worse, give him cause to think Agron was like all the others who had used him. 

How different things were now. How different Agron feared them to become. Would Nasir still be helping him, treating him this way, if Agron hadn't been so injured? Surely that was the only reason Nasir was here, with him, at present. 

Nasir unwrapped Agron's hand and began washing at the wound. His hands were shaking as they held Agron's. 

“If you would rather leave, go,” Agron said quietly. “I do not wish you to feel as though you are required to help me.”

Nasir remained quiet as he finished cleaning Agron's hand before placing the dirtied cloth with the others. “I do not intend to leave your side,” he said quietly, his hands holding onto Agron's broken one. 

“Even after all that has happened?” Agron asked quietly. If Nasir wanted to leave him, as he should, Agron would prefer him to leave now. 

Nasir brought Agron's hand to his face, pressing a kiss to his palm before placing it against his jaw. “Let us not worry about the past,” he said softly. “I would see you cleaned and your wounds dressed before the night.” 

Nasir wrapped his palm once again with cloth before setting it gently back upon Agron's thigh. He moved to Agron's other side to clean his other hand and arm. 

Agron was quiet as he watched Nasir removed the tattered cloth that covered the wound. He hated that he had chosen to leave. He still believed it was the right choice for him that would allow Nasir to have a fighting chance at a life filled with happiness that he deserved. Yet he had not been certain if it was the right choice for _them._ He hated that he had willingly given up the most beautiful, loving man he had ever known, no matter the reason. He meant what he had said to Nasir when they were first reunited. He _had_ been a fool to leave Nasir for he was all he had longed for from the moment they had parted ways. 

If he could not forgive himself, how was Nasir going to be able to?

Nasir quickly finished his other hand, pressing a kiss to this palm as well before wrapping it. He stood and grabbed a larger cloth meant for Agron's shoulder and stomach. He carefully wrapped it around the wounds before sighing. He fell once again to his knees and brought his hands to Agron's face, his eyes taking in the sight of Agron. 

“Gratitude for your help,” Agron whispered. 

“None needed,” Nasir told him. “Why don't you rest for a while? And I'll go to gather something to eat.”

Agron shook his head. “I'd rather go to funeral rights,” he said as he tried to stand. 

Nasir placed his hands on his shoulders as he stood. “And you shall. But first, rest a while,” Nasir said as he gently helped Agron to lay down. 

“Only for a short time,” Agron said, finally allowing his exhaustion to seep through him. “You will return?” 

“With food and drink,” Nasir promised. “That you may gain more strength before the funeral rights.” He leaned down to kiss Agron's cheek before resting his head against Agron's. 

Agron turned his head to catch Nasir's jaw with his lips wishing he had the strength to pull the man he had missed into his arms. He wished to hold him and have the comfort of Nasir's arms around him. He did not yet have the strength. 

Nasir pulled away and rubbed his hand through Agron's hair before resting at his jaw. “Rest,” he said softly.

Agron nodded and closed his eyes for he was exhausted. From being tortured, crucified, and forced to walk back to the rebel camp. He would rest for a while to wake with Nasir at his side to help him through this. 

As Agron drifted off to sleep his thoughts were filled with images of Nasir and a promise that he would never leave his side again, so long as the Syrian still wanted him around.

**Author's Note:**

> It was meant to have a lot more dialogue, but Agron was just too exhausted to say and do much of anything. Thankfully, Nasir saw that and recognized it. I may end up writing a semi-sequel to this that takes place their first night together where they finally do talk about the things that happened between them.


End file.
